Three Little Words

There are three little words in the English language that everyone wants to hear. They make us feel special. They make us feel cared about. They make us feel appreciated. But there is something particularly wonderful about hearing your little one say the words "I love you!".  We hold our babies close to our faces from the day that they are born, look them in the eyes and tell them how much we love them. For months and months it's all a one-sided  conversation.  Over and over we reassure our babies that they are loved. We tell them. We squeeze them. We kiss them. We cuddle them.

As they grow they begin to kiss us back and throw their arms around our necks for a snuggly cuddle.  They understand that these gestures display love for another person. Our children want us to know that they love us too and we have taught them how to do that. We continue to show them and tell them just how much we love them. Our hearts sometimes feel so full that they might just burst with love for our precious ones and they delight in knowing how precious they really are to us. 

Then that magical day comes when that same child who has grown a little bigger now and a little more loveable will look you straight in the eye, maybe hold your face or give you a squeeze and say those  wonderfully amazing words; "I love you Mama".

Just when you thought you couldn't possibly feel anymore love in your heart it seems to expand just a tiny bit more! There is just something extra special about hearing your child tell you that they love you. Particularly when you haven't prompted them. It's completely voluntary.  Ugh! What a fantastic moment.

So how must it feel for a mother who's child gets told every day how much he is loved, gets cuddled and squeezed and hugged and told how precious he is but she doesn't hear those three special words from his mouth?  Years pass. He doesn't tell her he loves her.  She prompts him. She asks him to repeat the words. Sometimes he does. Most times he doesn't. When he does it's not the same because she knows it's just repetition. She hears other children, younger children, tell their Mammys and Daddys how much they love them. "I love you thisssss much" they say as they stretch their arms out wide. Or "I love you up up up to the sky!".  And those parents faces light up and they can't help but smile a great big smile. And so they should. How wonderful. But each time she hears it from another child she is reminded that she doesn't hear it from her own and her heart aches.

Will she ever hear her son tell her that he loves her? She knows that it won't make any difference to how much she loves him. In fact because he has unique needs and difficulties and of course strengths it makes her love him that little bit more! But she knows that it may be another thing on the list that seems will never happen.  She just has to accept it.  She'll just tell him twice as much to make up for it. 

And then one morning as she is brushing her teeth in the bathroom her son calls out to her from his bed. "Mama, where are you? ".  "Here we go", she thinks. She braces herself for the routine of twenty minutes of repetitive questions asking where each individual household member is and what each individual household member is doing. Instead there is a short silence followed by the words she has longed so much to hear. "I love you Mama" he calls out. She stops, lifts her head, pauses for a moment and then through her tears she calls back "I love you too my precious baby".